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    August 31

    至于奶酪

     
     
    德语、意大利语、希腊语的基本好办,法语名称我基本靠猜,不过鼻音重一点,s/t 之类的字母不要随便发音就容易蒙混过关。

    Talking about 咖啡圣经


    直接抄袭一下Wikipedia的插图。至于发音么,因为pasta 基本都是意大利词汇, 注意适当的地方 c = ch, gn = ni ,-ne 最后的 e 要发音, 基本就应付个差不多了。至少老土的美国人不会跟你较真。

     

     

     

     

     

     

    Quote

    咖啡圣经

    要我说,英语其实不难,最难的是它的三座大山:咖啡名称、pasta名称和cheese名称。不但花样繁多,难记难读,念错了还会被人笑话是乡下曲辫子,直接打击学习积极性和胃口。现在,向往星巴克,却又不知道咖啡有几种、每种什么样儿、名字怎么念的人有福了。这个网站列出了常见咖啡的名称,读音,和图示。按图索骥,必有一款适合您。


    谁来给pasta和cheese做个图示?


    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

    Espresso
    [e-spres-oh]

    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
    Espresso Macchiato
    [e-spres-oh mock-e-ah-toe]

    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
    Espresso con Panna
    [e-spres-oh kon pawn-nah]

    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

    Caffé Latte
    [caf-ay lah-tey]

    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
    Flat White

    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
    Cafe Breve
    [caf-ay brev-ay]

    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

    Cappuccino
    [kap-oo-chee-noh]

    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
    Caffé Mocha
    [caf-ay moh-kuh]

    Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
    Americano
    [uh-mer-i-kan-oh]

    来源

    August 30

    传说中滴火星文

    屾覀窰伮倳件哋蔉蔉悇菠狆,洧①個尒菠瀾湜渻萇纡孧軍苸吁菅園仩蛧,纡孧軍並儭洎蜩楂菅園仩蛧凊況,怼疏纡仩蛧哋菅園汏咖哬斥。嘸獨洧耦,偅庆巿逶書汜忹樣洂纡菦ㄖ僦偅庆琮匼妀愅問計蛧伖,洏賺嘚眼浗嘸薮。

    娸實,嚴咯説唻,適些嘟匴芣嘚特莂哋噺聞。皁茬SARS剘簡,媒軆巳經広疺蕔檤,國傢領导亾炷婹徣莇沍聅蛧孒解疫凊。炡菭滈層怼沍聅蛧凊洧獨妕,沍聅蛧茬狆國洇泚獨颭颩洸,適皁僦湜狆國舆囵鎅哋①個显著特脃。

    泹湜苴嫚歡苸。沍聅蛧茬狆國哋適種獨颭颩洸,並芣囸瑺。

    姩初莪嶒姒媒軆亾裑妢,赴羙栲镲。①個堔尅哋茚潒湜,沍聅蛧茬狆羙倆國哋哋莅落槎悬姝。洳淉説,沍聅蛧茬狆國舆囵鎅洧洳颩騒滟妇,哪庅茬羙國舆囵鎅,沍聅蛧荝芣過湜①個恣脃岼岼哋街汸姄妇。羙國朂犇哋媒軆,迄妗畩嘫湜《狃箹溡蕔》,《溡笩淍刋》,《澕墭頓邮蕔》等等伝統媒軆,沵茬哪里艮夲僦見芣菿渚洳噺烺適樣哋蛧絡恐瀧。當嘫,沵竾芣浍厛説,羙國哪個詶萇,戓鍺縂統諨縂統畩靠沍聅蛧唻狪镲國凊姄嬑。沍聅蛧茬羙國炷婹迀什庅鼡哋?炷婹僦鼡纡電ふ啇務,賣賣貨、媾媾粅洏巳。慾倁兲芐汏倳,還湜伝統媒軆靠嘚炷。

    適僦湜説,羙國亾莈洧菿沍聅蛧仩潵荹哋習遦。伝統媒軆娖夠潑垯,能夠茺汾慲娖彵們哋信息濡浗,彵們叒哬湏崂煩洎己,烸兲佝偻着裑ふ,汃茬電悩屛募湔,挖涳杺偲哋苁沍聅蛧仩湥圍,苁沍聅蛧仩厾浔找哪些鮮潙亾倁哋咩肠尒檤迡?

    莪哋萠伖熋掊囩姺泩,妑炡菭滈層怼沍聅蛧哋偅視,稱莋“沍聅蛧秇炡”,説適湜苁羙國哋“噺聞秇炡”潑蹍過唻哋。羙國戓洧“噺聞秇炡”,泹苁嘸葰媦 “沍聅蛧秇炡”,洇潙沍聅蛧茬羙國舆囵鎅莈哋莅,炡椨芣濡婹茬沍聅蛧仩埖哪庅哆杺偲。狆國芣嘫,狆國並嘸“噺聞秇炡”,“沍聅蛧秇炡”反箌涳湔瀿荣。適戓汻湜狆羙舆囵泩忲哋①個朂偅婹哋槎莂。

    棑篨“噺聞秇炡”哋葰媦“沍聅蛧秇炡”,湜芣惪嘚潙と歡苸哋,咜艮夲仩僦湜姒犠狌伝統媒軆哋囸瑺潑蹍潙笩價。菦剘颩起囩悀哋厷珙倳件狆,伝統媒軆哋崣縮戓鍺説猥鎖匨忲,巳湜①灠嘸悇。偅庆朂犇町ふ戶倳件狆,偅庆當哋媒軆洧哬闆咯妸訁?厦閄PX倳件狆,厦閄當哋媒軆芣湜迀脆玙姄嬑揹檤洏肔,洏吲唻瑫瑫悪评?怼哜遖懪雨啝哜遖嚗怍案,哜遖當哋媒軆芣湜迄妗仍①矗妷娪,泠哜遖巿姄芣能芣炷婹苁迯哋媒軆孒解蕜涺嫃楿庅?

    狆國涻浍囸處纡汾囮と狆,赽趚形荿哋茖種特姝悡谥潗團,囸茬唍荿怼纡悡谥笵圍哋苆剨。彵們茬茖洎哋悡谥笵圍禸獨覇①汸,笣葀獨覇媒軆。彵們妑夲屬纡厷珙粢羱哋夲哋媒軆,變荿孒彵們洎己哋伝殸茼,呮能萣姠潑鈽彵們禧歡厛哋、彵們唏朢厛哋殸堷。汎屬纡彵們芣禧歡厛哋,芣唏朢厛哋殸堷,①侓斥潙卆堷,洏芣厝秏曊滈昻哋經哜荿夲啝涻浍炡菭荿夲,洤劦崶陼。彵們洧洳信息嫼狪,將①苆洧莇纡熷萇厷姄潪劦哋信息屛幣嘚迀迀凈凈,导臸姖汏哋信息嫃涳,导臸亾們信息仩姖汏哋饥皒憾啝嘸劦憾。亾們嘸琺苁洎己裑笾哋媒軆,唻孒解洎己哋泩洊寰璄,唻叛斷洎己哋泩洊匨忲,唻莋炪楿應怼憡。

    伝統媒軆湜朂荿孰哋媒軆,朂粢堔,朂抟鄴。洇泚玙國亾嗵瑺理解哋楿反,伝統媒軆財湜朂妸靠哋信息滈趚厷蕗。蛧絡夲唻芣過湜伝統媒軆哋辅莇罢孒。泹茬莪們適里,適個羅辑唍洤颠箌孒過唻。亾們苁伝統媒軆仩找芣菿汸姠,找芣菿炪蕗;洏泩纡信息溡笩,信息栱给暀暀荿孒泩掵線。廹芣嘚巳,亾們呮能苁沍聅蛧仩湥圍。特姝悡谥潗團哋圍搥陼截朂蔠妑辤衆嘟腷菿孒沍聅蛧仩,慥荿孒迣鎅仩朂潙厐汏哋蛧姄羣軆,慥荿孒迣鎅仩朂瀿荣哋蛧絡舆囵。

    泹湜,被腷菿沍聅蛧仩哋,吷芣僅僅湜普囉汏衆。特姝悡谥潗團哋信息屛幣芣呮怼芐。夲哋媒軆凅嘫芣話芐,迯哋媒軆竾妸鼡種種掱葮擺岼,卙臸旣楩禸傪,竾婹講究葰媦“导姠”,浕妸能蕔禧芣蕔沋。洳泚兲囉哋蛧芣啴剝奪厷姄哋倁凊權,浭湜怼纡炡菭滈層哋信息崶鎻,浭湜潙孒蒩撓炡菭滈層痽確妑楃涻凊姄嬑。剘焄と嶵苁唻嘟湜嗼汏と嶵,娸懲藅嘟洳颩懪檑霆,蕝芣畱凊。哯茬“剘焄”汏垳娸檤,旣剘莋潙炷權鍺哋厷姄,浭剘炡菭滈層。洏怼適種叒姠“剘焄”,莪們獍娕掱嘸憡。

    適種揹憬芐,炡菭滈層楩暀暀茛普囉汏衆蹧喁哃樣哋掵運,蹧喁姖汏哋信息饥皒憾啝嘸劦憾。厛菿湈個滈级領导亾洳哬懄纡仩蛧,洳哬偅視蛧絡姄嬑,莪們瑺瑺潙と歡俽鼔橆,姒潙適湜哯笩炡菭傢應洧哋颩喥。娸實,哯笩炡菭傢厡夲嘸湏掎偅沍聅蛧。呮婹媒軆能浕洎甴蕔檤嫃楿哋兲轵;呮婹姄嬑笩錶能浕筗實反眏選姄苸殸哋兲轵;呮婹國傢哋茖種瑺規蔎湤能茖浕夲妢,囸瑺運啭,僦芣浍洧普猵洏歭玖哋信息陼噻啝信息短蒛哯潒。炡菭滈層僦洎嘫砽洧④嗵仈垯哋芉里眼順颩洱,僦芣浍縂湜被芐屬葰剘,洏怭湏苁沍聅蛧仩湥圍。怼纡涻浍炡菭唻説,沍聅蛧逺莈洧莪們想潒哋偅婹。沍聅蛧哋橫涳炪迣芣過湜菦凢拾姩哋倳,洏潑垯國傢汏哆洧凢咟姩哋宪炡史孒。莈洧沍聅蛧哋凢咟姩里,彵們芣燳樣過嘚侹恏?囸瑺哋信息蓅嗵僟淛仳“沍聅蛧秇炡”浭偅婹,適應姟湜彵們凢咟姩哋宪炡史给當芐狆國哋①點晵沶妑。

    ——厡酨《姺峯◎蜩楂》卆梽2007姩苐9剘
    August 29

    传说中的40部

    国家新闻出版总署今天宣布,要求各地深入开展对网上淫秽色情信息的行政执法活动。严厉查处扰乱网络出版正常秩序、危害青少年身心健康的网络淫秽色情小说。

    鉴于近日一些网站登载含有淫秽色情内容的小说,国家新闻出版总署下发《关于严厉查处网络淫秽色情小说的紧急通知》,要求各地按照属地管理和“谁主管、谁负责”的原则,对照本通知公布的《四十部淫秽色情网络小说名单》和《登载淫秽色情小说的境内网站名单》,责令辖区内有关网站立即删除名单中所列淫秽色情小说,禁止任何网站登载、链接、传播相关信息。对未按要求删除淫秽色情小说及其相关信息的网站,依照有关规定,给予行政处罚。对变换地址逃避监管的网站,要及时跟踪搜索,依法从严查处,必要时,将依法关闭该网站。对网上登载淫秽色情小说、传播淫秽色情信息涉嫌犯罪的案件,要按规定及时移送公安机关。
     
    据传,该40部小说为:
     
    江湖淫娘
    红楼绮梦
    骆冰淫传
    夫妇乐园
    阿里布达年代记
    爱神之传奇
    不良少女日记
    沧澜曲
    创世之子猎艳之旅
    东北风情熟女之惑
    风骚侍女
    海盗的悠闲生活
    黑天使
    黑星女侠
    混蛋神风流史
    狡猾的风水相师
    狂风暴雨
    俪影蝎心
    梦中的女孩
    秦青的幸福生活
    四海龙女
    逃亡艳旅
    我的性启蒙老师
    现代艳帝传奇
    星光伴我淫
    倚天屠龙别记
    淫术炼金士
    十景缎
    往事追忆录
    舌战法庭
    少妇白洁
    风月大陆
    风尘劫
    美少妇的哀羞
    阿兵哥言语录
    遥想当年春衫薄
    王子淫传
    神雕外传之郭襄
    睡着的武神
     
    August 28

    今天格外喜欢加州


    "If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there."
      Lewis Carroll

    CALIFORNIA DRIVERS TEST

    For those of you who are not "fortunate" enough to live in California ,
    here is a copy of the California Driver's Exam, and for those of you who do, study real hard.   This is a new Exam.

    Since driving conditions (and culture) are unique in California , you may not have realized that the California Department of Motor Vehicles has now issued a special Application and driver's test solely for the California area.

    2007 CALIFORNIA DRIVER'S LICENSE APPLICATION

    Name: ___________________ Stage Name:__________________


    Agent: ___________________ Attorney:____________________


    Therapist's Name: _________________

    Sex: [ ] Male [ ] Female*


    [ ] Formerly Male [ ] Formerly Female [ ] Both


    *If female, indicate breast implant size: _______
    Will the size of your implants hinder your ability to safely operate a
    motor vehicle in any way?


             [ ] Yes [ ] No

    Please list brand of cell phone: ________.


    If you don't own a cell phone, please explain why you don't:
    _______________________________________________
     (Use extra pages, if necessary)

    Please check hair color:


     Females: [ ] Blonde [ ] Platinum Blonde
     Teenagers: [ ] Red [ ] Orange [ ] Green [ ] Purple [ ] Blue
     [ ] Skinhead [ ] Other ___________

    Please check activities you perform while driving: (Check all that
    apply)


     [ ] Eating
     [ ] Drinking Starbucks coffee
     [ ] Applying make-up
     [ ] Shaving (male or female)
     [X] Talking on the phone (already checked for your convenience)
     [ ] Lifting weights
     [ ] Slapping kids in the back-seat
     [ ] Applying cellulite treatment to thighs
     [ ] Tanning
     [ ] Watching TV
     [ ] Reading Variety
     [ ] Surfing the net via laptop
     [ ] Discharging firearms / reloading

    Please indicate how many times, while driving, you expect to:


     [ ] a) Shoot at other drivers ___
     [ ] b) Be shot at ___

    If you are the victim of a carjacking, you should immediately:


     [ ] a) Call the police to report the crime.
     [ ] b) Call Channel 4 News to report the crime, then watch your car on
     the news in a high-speed chase.
     [ ] c) Call your attorney and discuss lawsuit against cellular phone
    company  for your 911 call not going through.
     [ ] d) Call your therapist.

    In the event of an earthquake, you should:


     [ ] a) Stop your car.
     [ ] b) Keep driving and hope for the best.
     [ ] c) Immediately use your cell phone to call all loved ones.
     [ ] d) Pull out your video camera and obtain footage for Channel 4.

    In the instance of rain, you should:


     [ ] a) Never drive over 5 MPH.
     [ ] b) Drive twice as fast as usual.
     [ ] c) You're not sure what "rain" is.

    Please indicate your current number of therapy sessions per week:
    ________

    Are you presently taking any of the following medications?


     [ ] a) Prozac
     [ ] b) Zovirax
     [ ] c) Lithium
     [ ] d) Zanax
     [ ] e) Valium
     [ ] f) Medical pot
     [ ] g) Zoloft
     [ ] h) All of the above
     [ ] i) None of the above*
     * If none, please explain: __________________.

    Length of daily commute:


     [ ] a) Less than 1 hour*
     [ ] b) 1 hour
     [ ] c) 2 hours
     [ ] d) 3 hours
     [ ] e) 4 hours or more
     * If less than 1 hour, please explain:____________________.

    When stopped by police, you should:


     [ ] a) Pull over and have your driver's licence and insurance form
    ready.
     [ ] b) Try to outrun them by driving the wrong way on the freeway.
     [ ] c) Have your video camera ready and provoke them to attack, thus
    ensuring  yourself of a hefty lawsuit profit.

    Which part of your car will wear out first?


     [ ] a) The wiper blades
     [ ] b) The seat belts
     [ ] c) The horn

    Automatic door locks are good for:


     [ ] a) Security
     [ ] b) Convenience
     [ ] c) Messing with the heads of people trying to get in.

    The "bright" setting on your headlights is for:


     [ ] a) Dark, poorly lit roads
     [ ] b) Flashing to get the car ahead to move out of the way
     [ ] c) Revenge

    If you are over the age of 75, you do not have to complete this test;
    you are entitled to drive even if you cannot see, hear, or move.

      

    August 23

    I still can't believe he can do it like that...

     
     美国电视观众都知道 Terry Fator 了 - 新一季 America's Got Talent (《美国达人》)冠军。从下面这段录像看,他老人家似乎成名已久 。可是我仍然无法相信自己的眼睛和耳朵 - 世上居然有如此奇人!得亚军的 Cas Haley 当然也很牛,但还要算人力可及;Terry Fator 完全是天外飞仙的级别。
     
    前四名的顺序跟我预测的完全一致,呵呵。
     
        
    August 21

    内有强奸 / 兽交 / interracial 慎入

        
    August 17

    推荐一个牛人

     
    王相俊,1980年出生于山东省烟台市,4岁随姐学习绘画;92年入张宁涛画室;96年拜北京雕塑家付鸿朴为师;97年入天津美院学习雕塑;2001年考入烟台大学建筑系;同年拜烟台大学老师--写意钢笔画画家李明同为师;2003年入韩国漫画家协会主席-韩国著名漫画家朴峰成旗下;同年拜韩国第一漫画背景设计师金敦默为师;后创作写实钢笔画至今。
     

    更多作品请看 http://www.wxj.cdd.cn/

    August 16

    连我们公司也被和谐了

     
    公司内部网站,专门向员工吹牛用的,登了一篇报道,说的是济南铁路局胶济线高速列车牛逼,是因为其中央控制系统使用的是本公司产品。配文照片:
     

     

    August 15

    Talking about 万水千山(还没)走遍

     

    这回可怜了点,Leizi 同学几乎是我的 superset

    这个 Mark Wang 同学"去过"的说法实在让我别扭,这是题外话

     
    create your own China map

    Quote

    万水千山(还没)走遍
    这个网站,看看自己去过国内的什么地方?


    create your own China map

    Talking about 万水千山(还没)走遍 - 美国版

     

    跟 Leiziboy 同学接近于互补了,呵呵

    在中国知名度最高的加州,纽约,佛罗里达,夏威夷四大旅游胜地都没去过,很不可思议

    Visited States
    Visited US States Map from TravelBlog  

    Quote

    万水千山(还没)走遍 - 美国版
    Visited States
    Visited US States Map from TravelBlog
    August 14

    史上最强造假

    郑州夜市现人造鸡蛋 每公斤5毛多钱

      2007年08月13日郑州日报

      鸡蛋的蛋清、蛋黄和蛋壳全部是用化学原料制成,没有一点天然的成分,这
    些你能相信吗?昨天,经营食品添加剂的王先生,向记者讲述了他在某夜市小吃
    摊的遭遇。并当着记者的面,现场用海藻酸钠等几种化学制剂制作出了一个有蛋
    清、蛋黄和蛋壳的完整“鸡蛋”。 记者靳刚 实习生张蔚文/图

      这就是用来凝固“鸡蛋黄”的氯化钙。

      将调好的鸡蛋黄液体倒入容器中。

      将调好的鸡蛋黄液体放入溶解了氯化钙的水中凝固,一分钟后,人造鸡蛋黄
    就成形了。

      将凝固了的人造鸡蛋黄放入人造鸡蛋清中,一个人造鸡蛋就做好了。

      多处夜市小吃摊频现假鸡蛋

      王先生说,前几天,他在中陆广场的夜市上吃饭时偶然发现,小吃摊上的鸡
    蛋不像是天然的,凭着多年经营食品添加剂的经验,他断定这些“鸡蛋”是由某
    种化学药品合成的,于是专门买了一盘假鸡蛋做的菜,然后把老板叫到一边质问
    其到底是怎么回事。开始老板还不肯说,但听说王先生要到有关部门告他,只好
    说了实话:原来这些“鸡蛋”都是人造的,是从专门的造假者手中买的,并说该
    造假者每天最少生产3000到4000枚这种鸡蛋,都卖到了这些夜市摊点上。最后,
    小吃摊老板还把假鸡蛋的制作方法告诉了王先生。

      11日晚10时,在王先生的带领下,记者来到中陆夜市和长江夜市大排档,在
    其中一些小吃摊上,确实看到了这种用化学原料制作的假鸡蛋。

      1公斤假鸡蛋成本才0.55元

      为了解假鸡蛋的详细制作过程,昨天下午,记者来到王先生家,王先生现场
    演示了假鸡蛋的制作方法。他拿出一些已经浸泡过的海藻酸钠水溶液,调节浓度,
    搅拌均匀,一会儿就形成一种看上去微白透明,和蛋清一样有黏度的液体,这就
    是“鸡蛋清”了。

      然后,他把这种液体分出一部分,加入少量的柠檬黄食品色素,调节颜色的
    深浅与鸡蛋黄的颜色近似,然后,将这些液体用球型容器装了,迅速放入溶解了
    氯化钙的水中,不到一分钟,“鸡蛋黄”外面迅速形成一层透明的凝固物,“鸡
    蛋黄”就成形了。然后他将“蛋黄”放入“蛋清”中,再放入事先用碳酸钙做的
    蛋壳中,封口后,一个用化学原料制作的完整“鸡蛋”就呈现在记者面前,前后
    用了不到5分钟时间。

      王先生说,有的造假者为让“鸡蛋”看上去更逼真,会在“蛋黄”和“蛋清”
    中加入一些明矾和明胶,有的人甚至在“蛋黄”中加入淀粉、面粉或蛋黄粉,以
    便使“鸡蛋黄”煮熟后口感更逼真,根据蛋黄颜色的不同调节,还可以做出变蛋
    和咸鸡蛋等。

      王先生算了笔账:现在1公斤鸡蛋在6.5元左右,而1公斤的海藻酸钠只需要
    42元钱,能制作出150公斤的假鸡蛋,加上其他费用,1公斤假鸡蛋的成本才0.55
    元左右。

      在此提醒市民注意,本报将进一步关注假鸡蛋的动向,并希望有知道其生产
    窝点的市民,及时向我报或相关部门投诉,以便杜绝其继续危害市民。

      如何识别真假鸡蛋

      国家有关部门对这些食品添加剂,辅助剂的用法、用量都有明确规定,而这
    些原料在人造鸡蛋中却成了主要成分。此类物质长期食用会造成人的大脑记忆力
    衰退、痴呆。记者从有关专家处了解到,辨别真假鸡蛋有几个方法:假鸡蛋蛋壳
    的颜色比真鸡蛋亮一些,但不太明显;用手触摸假鸡蛋蛋壳,会觉得比真鸡蛋粗
    糙;在晃动假鸡蛋时会有声响,这是因为水分从凝固剂中溢出的缘故;用鼻子细
    细地闻,真鸡蛋会有隐隐的腥味;轻轻敲击,真鸡蛋发出的声音较脆,假鸡蛋声
    音较闷;假鸡蛋打开后不久,蛋黄和蛋清就会融到一起,这是因为蛋黄与蛋清是
    同质原料制成所致;在煎假蛋时,会发觉蛋黄没有搅动便自然散开,这是因为包
    着人造蛋黄的薄膜受热裂开的缘故;假鸡蛋煮熟后嚼在嘴里有点像橡皮,不仅没
    有蛋味,而且像花瓣一样有颜色分层。
     

    我也来个街头巷尾手机拍

     
    上个周末家门口的飞行表演
    至于拍摄效果嘛,哈哈,基本上看不清
     
     
    A-10 Thunderbolt

    Navy Blue Angels F-18A Hornets 

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    还看到了一架F-117 Stealth Fighter, 可惜没有拍下来。

    最后转贴个搞笑的:段喧小朋友没穿裤子作节目穿帮 

    August 10

    其实我有不少想写的东西

     
    一是也没人想我,二是 Windows Live Spaces 越搞越恶心,所以没心情写了。
     
    洗洗睡了。
    August 02

    The trials of the Hogwarts IT director

     
    Some would think of people who know Harry Potter inside and out as geeks. A lot more would people who work in IT. But combine an IT guy and a Harry Potter fan(atic), BOOM!!! you got this:
     
     
    Plucked from the personal archives of the late Albus Dumbledore, headmaster
     
    From: Coxrid, IT director, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
     

    To: Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster

    Re: My resignation (Where did this memo come from?)

    Headmaster:

    I regret that I must resign my position, effective two weeks ago, at least.

    It is simply impossible under these conditions to create a modern, integrated, flexible IT architecture aligned with the school’s educational mission and objectives.

    Deployment of the OC-3 fiber backbone met insuperable difficulties, as you know, when the cabling crew was attacked repeatedly by Dementors. Cabling staff rarely are effervescent people in the best of times, and having their life force sucked through their faces by cloaked, shadowy horrors as they lay paralyzed in icy terror is a serious de-motivator.

    I may say that your presumably jocular suggestion that the Cisco Certified Network Professional training be modified to include instruction in casting the Patronus Charm was not well received.

    As you know, it was considered impractical to deploy CAT5 cable in most areas because of the prevalence of solid granite walls, floors and ceilings and your adamant refusal to consider installing drop-down ceilings — not to mention the difficulties imposed by randomly moving staircases.

    But attempts to deploy a wireless LAN have been frustrated by first-form students removing the antennas from the access points, in the conviction that these make superior wands. A conviction that proved immune to a very rigorous, indeed educational, outreach program by the school’s able caretaker, Argus Filch.

    Of course, this obstacle was dwarfed by the so-called magical-interference problem. Reluctantly, at your request, I did raise this issue in a series of phone calls with Cisco Technical Support.

    It quickly became clear that magic was not an issue with which Cisco Tech Support was familiar, even when escalated to the highest level. I patiently explained that, of course it was not magical spells per se that were causing interference, but the transmission of the wizard’s (or witch’s) energy, via the wand, occasioned by the spells. This explanation was met, variously, by expressions of confusion and outright disbelief and not infrequently, by ridicule.   

    “This sounds like a spectrum-regulation issue for the FCC,” said one Cisco employee, nearly choking in laughter at his own leaden attempt at humor.

    A supervisor finally confirmed that Cisco had no plans to modify its radio-frequency management software to detect and compensate for magic, but that I could file a request for change through my Cisco account representative. In retrospect, I believe this, too, was intended as humor.

    Even usually mundane issues proved burdensome. Just one example will suffice. One of the main wiring closets was to be the rarely used second-floor girls’ bathroom, which when renovated would be an ideal location. Except, of course, for the ghost. Moaning Myrtle’s initial flooding of the bathroom resulted in the loss of switches and associated equipment worth in excess of 18,000 galleons. Negotiations proved fruitless in the face of her unceasing moaning and crying, and the project was abandoned.

    Also abandoned was a plan to create a wireless mesh network to cover the outlying Quidditch pitch, when beaters on both teams repeatedly used the mesh nodes as practice targets for their bludgers.

    Despite all this, one could have persevered (IT professionals are uncommonly stubborn, which is often mistaken for thickheadness), but for the quite unexpected and even more stubborn resistance by Hogwarts faculty to the introduction of modern technology into the classroom.

    I made a thorough and elaborate PowerPoint presentation on the benefits that an online learning management system would deliver for faculty and students (Professor Snape’s contemptuous dismissal of it as the work of a “PowerPoint wizard” was uncalled for).

    In vain did I describe how online courses could increase the school’s revenue stream and achieve profitability goals; the greater flexibility, not to mention safety, of using 3-D online simulations of boggarts instead of the shape-shifters themselves; the desirability of an online potions catalog, cross-referenced with the Ministry of Magic’s database of potential side effects; an interactive, voice-automated Parseltongue translation system; a Defense Against the Dark Arts curriculum based on next-generation gaming software; a digital library to replace the heavy, often musty tomes of incantations; and an information security infrastructure to block access by He Who Must Not Named.   

    Yet when Professor of Divination Sybill Trelawney said the proposed IT architecture was “insensitive to the Inner Eye,” I realized my efforts were hopeless.

    I have done all I can, Headmaster. I’m afraid that despite my best efforts, Hogwarts’ IT communications infrastructure will remain dependent on owls, talking letters, the use of Floo powder and a fireplace network, and of course, divinations, dreams and visions.

    I am returning (once the full moon is past) to the Muggle world of cellular data services and high-tech IPOs. They at least, appreciate the true magic of information technology.

    Your obedient servant,

    Coxrid

    From: Coxrid, IT director, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

    China's Me Generation - TIME

     
     

    Six friends out on a friday evening, the seafood plentiful, the conversation flowing. Maria Zhang — big hoop earrings, tight velvet jacket and a good deal of meticulously applied makeup — starts to describe an island that everyone is talking about off the east coast of Thailand. It has great diving, she says, and lots of Chinese there so you don't have to worry about language. Her friend Vicky Yang is hunched over a borrowed laptop, downloading an e-mail from a pesky client on her cell phone. An actuary at a consulting firm, Vicky needs to close a project tonight. While she phones a colleague, the dinner-table conversation moves on to snowboarding ("I must have fallen a hundred times") to the relative merits of various iPods ("Shuffle is no good") and the sudden onrush of credit cards in China. Silence Chen, an account executive with advertising giant Ogilvy & Mather in Beijing, tells the group he recently received six different cards in the mail. "Each one has a credit limit of 10,000," he says, laughing. "So suddenly I'm 60,000 yuan richer!" The talk turns to China's online shopping business, before that is interrupted by the arrival of razor clams, chili squid and deep-fried grouper.

    The one subject that doesn't come up — and almost never does when this tight-knit group of friends gets together — is politics. That sets them apart from previous generations of Chinese élites, whose lives were defined by the epic events that shaped China's past half-century: the Cultural Revolution, the opening to the West, the student protests in Tiananmen Square and their subsequent suppression. The conversation at Gang Ji Restaurant suggests today's twentysomethings are tuning all that out. "There's nothing we can do about politics," says Chen. "So there's no point in talking about it or getting involved."

    There are roughly 300 million adults in China under age 30, a demographic cohort that serves as a bridge between the closed, xenophobic China of the Mao years and the globalized economic powerhouse that it is becoming. Young Chinese are the drivers and chief beneficiaries of the country's current boom: according to a recent survey by Credit Suisse First Boston, the incomes of 20- to 29-year-olds grew 34% in the past three years, by far the biggest of any age group. And because of their self-interested, apolitical pragmatism, they could turn out to be the salvation of the ruling Communist Party — so long as it keeps delivering the economic goods. Survey young, urban Chinese today, and you will find them drinking Starbucks, wearing Nikes and blogging obsessively. But you will detect little interest in demanding voting rights, let alone overthrowing the country's communist rulers. "On their wish list," says Hong Huang, a publisher of several lifestyle magazines, "a Nintendo Wii comes way ahead of democracy."

    The rise of China's Me generation has implications for the foreign policies of other nations. Sinologists in the West have long predicted that economic growth would eventually bring democracy to China. As James Mann points out in his new book, The China Fantasy, the idea that China will evolve into a democracy as its middle class grows continues to underlie the U.S.'s China policy, providing the central rationale for maintaining close ties with what is, after all, an unapologetically authoritarian regime. But China's Me generation could shatter such long-held assumptions. As the chief beneficiaries of China's economic success, young professionals have more and more tied up in preserving the status quo. The last thing they want is a populist politician winning over the country's hundreds of millions of have-nots on a rural-reform, stick-it-to-the-cities agenda.

    All of which means democracy isn't likely to come to China anytime soon. And that poses challenges for Western policymakers as they try to engage China without condoning the Communist Party's record of political repression and its failures to improve the lives of the country's rural poor. China watchers say the Me generation's reluctance to agitate for reform is driven in part by a reluctance to tarnish China's moment in the sun. "They are proud of what China has accomplished, and very positive about the government," says P.T. Black, who conducts extensive marketing research for a Shanghai-based company called Jigsaw International. The political passivity of China's new élite makes sense while the good times roll. The question is what will happen to the Me generation — and to China — when they end.

    For anyone who visited the workers' paradise when it was still the land of Mao suits and communes, trying to reconcile that China to the one that young élites live in today is disorienting. When I first visited China in 1981, I went to the People's Park in Shanghai with two traveling companions. Our obligatory Foreign Ministry "guide" ushered us through a special gate reserved for "foreign friends." A knot of young Chinese had gathered outside. As we passed, a few made loud comments about the unfairness of having parts of the People's Park reserved only for foreigners. One of my companions, a Mandarin speaker, agreed volubly in Chinese. Immediately a group of young Chinese men and women surrounded us and peppered us with questions that mixed naiveté and aspiration: Are there still slaves in America? Where did you learn to speak Chinese? Do all American families really have three cars? Can you help me go to America?

    That discussion took place 25 years ago, the span usually allotted to a single generation. The naive, wary Chinese I met that day could be the parents of the group gathered for the seafood feast in Beijing. But there is almost nothing about the appearance, attitudes, life experience, education or dreams for the future that those young people in the Shanghai People's Park share with the likes of Vicky and her friends.

    The most obvious change is demographic. Because of China's one-child policy, instituted in 1978, this is the first generation in the world's history in which a majority are single children, a group whose solipsistic tendencies have been further encouraged by a growing obsession with consumerism, the Internet and video games. At the same time, today's young Chinese are better educated and more worldly than their predecessors. Whereas the so-called Lost Generation that grew up in the Cultural Revolution often struggled to finish high school, today around a quarter of Chinese in their 20s have attended college. The country's opening to the West has allowed many more of its citizens to satisfy their curiosity about the world: some 37 million will travel overseas in 2007. In the next decade, there will be more Chinese tourists traveling the globe than the combined total of those originating in the U.S. and Europe. Rather than fueling restlessness among the Me generation, however, the ease of travel seems to provide more evidence that the benefits of globalization can be had without radical change.

    There's another reason for the lack of political ferment: it's exhausting. Like anyone else, members of the Me generation are shaped by their experiences and those of their families. When their parents talk about the Great Leap Forward (a disastrous Mao campaign in the late 1950s that left 20 million to 30 million dead of starvation) and the subsequent chaos of the Cultural Revolution, they mostly tell horror stories that would put anyone off politics forever. That chapter in Chinese history, which officially ended with Mao's death in 1976, is ancient history to today's young élites. They have known little but peace and an ever increasing economic boom. "We have so much bigger a desire for everything than [our parents]," says Maria Zhang, 27. "And the more we eat, the more we taste and see, the more we want."

    One event that the Me generation does remember is the crackdown on student activists in Tiananmen Square in 1989. But to young Chinese like Maria and Vicky, the Tiananmen protests are less a source of inspiration than an admonishment. Were popular uprisings like Tiananmen allowed to continue, Vicky believes, they would have provoked a counterreaction by conservative forces and led to a return to fortress China: no more iPods, overseas shopping trips or snowboarding weekends. "I think that the students meant well," says Vicky, who was 11 at the time and has only vague memories of what happened. But the crackdown that ended the demonstrations "certainly was needed."

    Vicky embodies the shift in the priorities of young Chinese. She's a purposeful, 29-year-old actuary who rarely smiles but loves nothing better than a party. She and her friends meet so regularly for dinner and at bars that she says she never eats at home anymore. As the pictures on her blog attest, they also throw regular theme parties to mark holidays like Halloween and Christmas, and last year took a holiday to Egypt.

    Encouraged by her new boyfriend Wang Ning, a keen snowboarder, Vicky decided earlier this year to take up the sport as well. To prime for it, she went to a mall in south Beijing that specializes in pricey, imported skiing gear. She chose a gleaming new snowboard made by the Colorado company Never Summer, emblazoned with colorful, psychedelic paintings of butterflies. Along with gloves, goggles and other paraphernalia, the new gear set her back about $700. When asked about the wisdom of spending a small fortune on equipment for a sport she may never take to, she says, "I believe you have to be fully prepared and equipped before you decide to start a new hobby." Besides, she adds, "even if I don't like skiing, think how nice [the gear] will look in the hallway of my apartment. Guests won't know that I don't use it." Vicky smiles to signal she's joking. But she's dead serious when she explains, over coffee at Starbucks, her lack of interest in politics. "It's because our life is pretty good. I care about my rights when it comes to the quality of a waitress in a restaurant or a product I buy. When it comes to democracy and all that, well ..." She shrugs expressively and takes a sip of her latte. "That doesn't play a role in my life."

    People like Vicky and her friends represent the leading edge, the trailblazers for a huge mass of young, eagerly aspirant consumers. All over China, young professionals like these banter about blogging, travel and work-life balance. ("Work hard, play harder," says Vicky several times, repeating it in case she isn't heard.) If they can't afford to blow $700 on skiing gear, they want to be able to soon.

    And so for China's leaders, placating the Me generation is seen as critical to ensuring the Communist Party's survival. By 2015, the number of Chinese adults under 30 is expected to swell 61%, to 500 million, equivalent to the entire population of the European Union. From issues of grave consequence to trivialities, the government has made clear that it will do whatever it takes to keep the swelling middle class happy. In Beijing, for example, newly prosperous residents are snapping up automobiles at a rate of 1,000 a day. The number of vehicles on the capital's sclerotic roads has doubled in the past five years, to 3 million. (By comparison, there are about 2 million vehicles registered in all of New York City.) But despite a grim pollution problem (Beijing air quality is among the world's worst) that could embarrass China during next summer's Olympic Games, the central government has made no move to curb vehicle purchases through regulation or taxes. And that, in turn, has made it harder for governments in the developed world to make progress in getting Beijing to do more to fight climate change.

    That's just one example of the long-term impact of the government's focus on the Me generation. In an article in the official mouthpiece People's Daily published in February, Premier Wen Jiabao stressed that economic growth should take precedence over democratic reforms for the foreseeable future, a period that he appeared to indicate could stretch to 100 years. And yet for all its machinery of control, the party is vulnerable. Senior cadres from Wen on down have acknowledged in public that growing unrest in the provinces, as farmers clash with police over expropriated land or official corruption, could threaten the party's grip on power.

    As a result, China's rulers face a dilemma: the very policies that cater to the urban middle class come at the expense of the rural poor. So far the government is erring on the side of the rich. In March the government pledged to address problems plaguing the country's peasants, such as access to medical treatment and schooling, health insurance and the disparity between urban and rural incomes. And yet a relatively small portion of the budget was set aside to address the concerns of the peasantry, with the bulk of spending still concentrated on stoking the booming economy.

    Even more telling was the passage of what was widely viewed as one of the most important pieces of legislation to be put forward in several decades of reform: the revised law on property ownership. Pushed through despite objections from old-line conservatives, the law for the first time gave equal weight to both state- and private-ownership rights. But a look at the fine print shows that the law only protects things dear to the rising middle class: real estate, cars, stock-market assets. Farmers, on the other hand, will still be unable to purchase their land and instead will be forced to lease plots from the government.

    If left unchanged, such policies could exacerbate China's rich-poor divide and create conditions for tumultuous social upheaval. The test for China — as the Me generation grows bigger, richer and more powerful — will be whether it begins to push for the social and political reforms that are necessary to ensure China's long-term prosperity and stability. How likely is that? Though they're not exactly clamoring for free elections, members of the new middle class have shown a willingness to stand up to authority when their interests are threatened. Last October police in Beijing attempted to enforce rules limiting each household to a single, registered animal no taller than 14 in. (35 cm). The drive sparked a rare public demonstration by hundreds of well-heeled Chinese, mostly young dog owners. Within a month, according to Hong Kong's South China Morning Post, President Hu Jintao had intervened, ordering the Beijing authorities to back off. It was the first time most Beijingers could remember a public protest drawing a direct intervention by China's top leader.

    It was hardly Tiananmen, but a small triumph for free expression nonetheless. And if the West hopes to see China become democratic as well as prosperous, it will have to find ways to encourage modest breakthroughs like these, rather than expect sweeping change. At the Gang Ji Restaurant, where the dishes have been cleared and fresh fruit and more tea brought in, the mood is reflective. "We are lucky compared to our parents," says Maria Zhang, who works as a membership manager in one of the capital's most exclusive clubs. "My parents had nothing themselves. They lived for me." Wang Ning, the snowboarder who runs his own successful advertising company, agrees. "We are more self-centered. We live for ourselves, and that's good. We need to have the strength to contribute to the economy. That's our power. The power to contribute. That's how our generation is going to help the country." China's future will be defined by whether they realize that democracy can help China, too.